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HUMOROUS STORIES


Fun At The Movies

 
Last week Ronnie Walsh went to the movies at the Rialto Cinema in Bristol to see "Slumdog Millionaire" but because of two women loudly chatting together who were sitting in the row in front of him, Ronnie was unable to hear the dialogue clearly.

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WRITTEN BY : ANIL SHARMA    SUBMITTED BY : UTKARSH SHUKLA  


Boot On The Wrong Foot
 
Marlon asked the teacher to help him get his shoes on at the end of a busy day. After quite a struggle with the shoes, which were a little tight, Tessa finally got them on. 'They're on the wrong way round, Miss,' mumbled Marlon.

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WRITTEN BY : UNKNOWN      SUBMITTED BY : UTKARSH SHUKLA  


Aircrew Of The Month

This next yarn reminds of my former classmate Pete.  At school, Pete was always in the top 2/3 in our class, but once he left school, he never could settle in a job.  He landed a job as a bus driver, but his denouement came when he took a detour and drove the bus to his home.

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WRITTEN BY : Smith          SUBMITTED BY : UTKARSH SHUKLA  
 

Funny Tale of a Lost Senior Citizen

When I went to lunch today, I noticed an old man sitting on a park bench sobbing his eyes out.  I stopped and asked him what was wrong. He told me, 'I have a 22 year old wife at home. She rubs my back every morning and then gets up and makes me pancakes, sausage, fresh fruit and freshly ground coffee.'

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WRITTEN BY : ANONYMOUS          SUBMITTED BY : UTKARSH SHUKLA  
 

Easy to Swallow?
 
 

My sister, Paula, and her husband, Chris, had just finished tucking their young ones into bed one evening when they heard crying coming from the children's room. Rushing in, they found Tommy crying hysterically.

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WRITTEN BY : UTKARSH SHUKLA          SUBMITTED BY : UTKARSH SHUKLA 

Sleepless Night


There was an old Iranian who was intensely proud of two things - his long, white beard that reached down to his chest, and his ability to sleep the moment his head touched the pillow.
One day, his 3-year-old grandson asked him how he arranged his beard when he slept: did it go under the blanket or did it remain above it?

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WRITTEN BY : GAUTAM SHARMA              SUBMITTED BY : UTKARSH SHUKLA

The Best Artist


A despotic sultan who was blind in one eye invited three artists to paint his picture.
"If you do a bad portrait, I will punish you," he warned, "but if you do a good one I will reward you. Now start!"
The first artist produced a picture that showed the sultan as he was: blind in one eye.

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WRITTEN BY : ANONYMOUS                   SUBMITTED BY : UTKARSH SHUKLA 
 


A Wise Guy’s Funny Family Story  
Alyssa and I had our grubby 4-year-old hands wrapped around the turtle before it had taken more than a few steps into our play space. At lunchtime, we carefully placed it in a little yellow basket and ran into Alyssa’s grandparents’ house to show everyone our discovery.
 
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WRITTEN BY : MARISSA STITT        SUBMITTED BY : UTKARSH SHUKLA


 
A TALE OF SHEIKH CHILI
 
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Sheikh Chili was a son of rich merchant of town, Sadden.  But lots of riches and nourishment made him a silly and foolish boy. He grew up as a dumb man and anyone could easily fool him. His father wanted him to search for works thus send him to other town for work.
 
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WRITTEN BY : UTKARSH SHUKLA     SUBMITTED BY :  UTKARSH SHUKLA